Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Lessons Learned from...Heatwaves

It's another disgusting, hot, humid. smoggy day in Toronto. Between the 'baby blackout' on Monday and the layer of smog that persists in icing the horizon, it hasn't been one of Toronto's most inspiring weeks. Coming from Newfoundland (where you're lucky if Mother Nature simultaneously blesses you with sunshine and a temperature in the low-twenties), I automatically assume that warm weather necessitates outdoor play. It always catches me off guard when the radio people give their admonitions to stay indoors.

So we're stuck inside and graced with the lethargy that this temporary clime so often brings. Coupled with that, I am now "enjoying" (sometimes loving it, but still slightly bored) a leave of absence from work. The low energy and lack of structure is driving me mad. With no air conditioning in my apartment, what is there to do besides go shopping and binge on frozen treats? No wonder the American south is a region of overweight debtors.

I too was destined to that fate until I read the following line in Gourmet Rhapsody (a novel by Muriel Barbery, translated by Alison Anderson): "A pitiful but conscientious fan gave the room the charm of a breezy space but did little to refresh us". How perfectly does this describe the cooling device found in my living room!

So to combate the tempations of laziness and gastric indulgence, I now have a mission: try observe three things and describe them in the manner of the above. I have often thought that language is a tool with untapped potential; now I'll do by best to tap it. I challenge you to do the same and post your observations/descriptions here. Hopefully this heat will cause us all to learn something and see old things in a new light.

Life may have given Toronto lemons, so in typical Toronto one-upping fashion, let's make not just lemonade, but limoncello.

3 comments:

  1. Her towering Stiletto heels slowed her progress such that a new-born infant appears more mobile.

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  2. That's awesome, Scott! Here's my first attempt:
    After shooting up in the park, a woman began to practice yoga in her underwear. I was unsure if this yoga was an accidental side effect of hallucinogenic ingestion or the specifically-designed antidote to said toxic hallucinogens.

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  3. Here is my second attempt...
    I love the irony of giver-initiated favors (used furniture donations, elaborate goodbye parties, detailed restaurant recommendations): the giver is left feeling charitable and congratulating themselves on being so altruistic; the recipient is saddled with extra crap they don't need/want or forced to squeeze another obligation into their already overloaded schedule.

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